When I quitted my corporate career to start my own purpose-driven business, several people around me were chocked. Among others, they told me lines such as: “I thought you were a career person”.
You might have heard such lines at a certain stage of your life too. They come especially when you are going through an inner transformation.
For some reasons, knowingly or unknowingly we all feel the need to put the people around us in drawers. Do you remember the nice girl from school, the good child in your family, the perfect girlfriend in your circle? Or the outcast, the extrovert, the perfect mom, the victim, the terrorist… everyone talks about?
And in no time, those labels hold like a sticker on a glass jar.
And, whenever there is an expectation, disappointment is programmed.
The people around me who thought I was a career person, felt unsecure when I decided to run my career differently than they expected (running my own business is -by the way- MY definition of my career. I don´t feel at all like a non-career-person☺). Their reaction is just an indication of their own insecurities. Now, they have the hard task of putting me into a new closet.
Anytime I changed the course of my business (which happened at least every year at the beginning of my entrepreneurial journey) I was confronted with similar comments. “I thought you were a marketing person, now you are a singer?” or “I thought you were an event manager, now you are a coach?”
Why am I bringing this up?
I accompany most of my clients, who are creative female entrepreneurs, through a transformational process. Recently a dear client of mine came to me with the wish to completely change her career. She has worked for over 20 years in a specific function in her industry. Now, finally following her inner wisdom, she decided to embrace a completely new occupation in that same industry.
However, she is very well known in her field and her environment does not take her new occupation seriously. They all associate her with the former occupation, she is turning her back to.
If you are going through a transformation right now, know that the resistance from others HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU. When you have followed outer expectations for years, your environment tends to resist when you decide to follow your dreams.
People will put you in a drawer because of your origin, your name or whatever they think you are anyway.
So, how to break free from the drawers you´ve been put into?
First, check your mindset.
1) Know that you are not what/who other say you are: you are the one to decide who you want to be. If the current you is not happy, feel free to create a brand new you. People around you will have to deal with that.
2) You are powerful beyond measure: the whole world does not need to be understanding and helpful while you transition. You have most strength within you to master this change. Trust yourself. If you need some allies then choose them carefully (a positive friend, mentors, coaches…etc)
3) Your past does not determine your future: you´ve made a few bad decisions in the past? You are scared you will always be a failure? Know that your mindset can change everything for you. Find a way to work on it so that it serves you.
4) It is never too late to live your dream. Never ever ever. The only person standing in your way is only you.
Second, surround yourself with the right people.
Like I mentioned above, people who resist your transformation are showing you their own fears. It is up to you to decide to give in or not.
Nowadays, we have plenty of possibilities to connect with like-minded people. Networking is a great possibility and you will find several communities where you are that might be right for you. I have started a group for women in Germany. Sign up here for email notification about future events.
Furthermore you can choose to work with a mentor or a coach. It is someone who will hold your hands and hold you accountable, while giving you tools to reinforce your inner strength.
I´ll gladly elaborate with you how my coaching program can assist you in your transformation. Set up a strategy session with me to find out more.
NOW It´s YOUR TURN
When was the last time you were victim of labelling? How did the experience feel like? And how did you break free? Share with us in the comments.